I want to shout it from the rooftops! He found his way without school ❤️

Proud Mummy Moment! I just want to shout out about my son Samuel who has just phoned me with some wonderful news. Many of you know of him and his early struggles in school and that we ended up unschooling after a long and often hair raising journey to get there. He is now at 19 in his final year of his software engineering degree at the University of Queensland. As part of the work for one of his papers he has been going into industry to interview people and after one day he received a call from a company that said they had an internship going and they thought Samuel should apply if he was interested. He was not looking for work but the sound of it was something that really interested him. The date of application closure was the day they called him. He furiously filled the application and sent off his CV (which for someone with his executive function issues is huge to get himself into gear and organised to do this!) and was then called for an interview with 40 other applicants and he being the only homeschooler. He went for the interview and felt that it had gone well but was up against some other very talented young programmers. However, he got a call last week and was told that he was wanted for a second round of interviews. The interview happened on Tuesday and he was called last night offering him the internship!! Tears of joy from this proud Mama! He will be going in one day per week paid and taught all that they can teach him and then at the end of his degree has the offer of a full time position. My out of control (to others!) boy diagnosed with ADHD/ASD/ODD/Gifted and with learning difficulties (namely dyslexia and severe dysgraphia) who was suspended from every single school bar one (and he went to quite a few schools), who we were told needed serious psychiatric help by one school principal and who left the school system crushed, depressed and with little to no self esteem has just proved them all how wrong they were about him! I always knew that they were wrong but he didn't! He came home and was allowed to be the wonderful, smart human being that he is and always was. It was just that school didn't always see that and tried to "fix" him when he was never broken! To all those parents who worry about their children - please have faith. I know sometimes it is a huge leap of faith but Samuel was allowed to follow his passions and do things HIS way and I am so very proud of the young man he has become and his achievements today. He has proved to me that you don't need others to teach you, tell you what you need to or should be learning. Having a passion, interest or aptitude in something and being allowed to follow it really does work - well it has for my family anyway and I am sure it will for most heart emoticon

High School Years

After my post yesterday about worrying.  A few people have messaged me asking about my son and high school and university entrance.  Samuel was unschooling when he went to the University of the Sunshine Coast Open Day and checked out the ICT Department as his interest has always been in computing and most particularly programming.  They were really lovely there, although a little unused to homeschooling and particularly the fact that Samuel was not enrolled with any type of school and nor was he registered with HEU.  They spoke to him about the Headstart program that is available to Year 11 and 12 students but said that he needed to be enrolled with a school.  http://www.usc.edu.au/study/courses-and-programs/headstart-program-year-11-and-12-students The Headstart program gives teens a chance to try out a couple of Uni papers and go to lectures with the full time students and get a real feel for University and whether it might be something for them later.  If you pass the papers you are guaranteed a place on the full time degree whether you get OPs or complete Year 11 and 12 or not.  Since Samuel did the course they have changed the rules and now you just need to be registered with HEU - so no school enrolment is necessary.  He loved his time there and after having such a bad experience of school it gave him back his confidence and he was able to hang out with others who were as interested in programming as he was!

Unfortunately the degree that Samuel wanted to do was being discontinued so he looked to Brisbane and found a course that really excited him at the University of Queensland.  He decided to stay with Brisbane School of Distance Ed and complete his year 11 and 12 (but you really don't need to do that).  He was enjoying his time with them though and it was his choice completely what he wanted to do.  He had made some friends (which previously he had never had) so for him it was a great experience and although some say that BSDE are inflexible, we managed to muddle along in a way that suited Samuel - he really did kind of just do it his way - but then he always does!  He did not do the full quota of OP's and nor did he get the pre-requisite OP in English that it stipulated for his course but we just put his case forward about his learning difficulty in written English (having been diagnosed with Dysgraphia) but also showing that he had not only a great ability in programming but also a huge passion for the subject - sometimes you just have to speak up for what you want in life and if it has never happened before be the pioneer that makes sure it does!  His results from the Headstart course were a big help on his University application.  He was also able to show other things too that he had done such as gaining first aid certificates when he was in the surf life saving club etc.  You can gain points from things like this and they all go towards what is known as a 'ranking'.  So basically Samuel was offered a place at Uni going in on a ranking rather than an OP score.

There is also another option for those who wish to continue staying out of the system for as long as possible and that is to complete a TPP (Tertiary Preparation Pathway) course http://www.usc.edu.au/study/courses-and-programs/tertiary-preparation-pathway-tpp which if you pass will enable you direct entry onto a degree at the University of Sunshine Coast (and I am sure at other Universities across the country).  There really are so many options that I feel the best thing to do is just let your child follow their interests and see where it lead's them.   Well that has been our experience so far and it seems to have worked.  

For a child who was suspended from every school he went to (except his little primary school in the UK) and was seen as a big problem by many (having been diagnosed with ADHD/ASD/Gifted but with a learning difficulty - Dysgraphia - yep lots of labels that in no way define him!) - he has excelled at home, has kept his self esteem in tact and I have been privileged to spend the years that I have with him on a day to day basis before he flew the nest to go to University.  I am sure others will have different stories but this is a snippet of ours through the high school years - hope it helps lovely people who wanted to know! :D

To worry or not?...

I just wanted to share this with those who worry and I often see a lot of worry online in the homeschool forums... worry that they are not doing enough... worry that they are not using the right curriculum... worry that what they are doing is not the same as their friends... worrying about being registered, un-registered, just worrying about lots (I know I do at times!!).. There really is no right or wrong way to homeschool.. just what is right for you at any given time and things change (all the time!) and that is ok.

I have been homeschooling for 10 years now and have been registered, unregistered, used Distance Ed, done project based learning, unschooling (where I really did just let my son do whatever he wanted and that actually worked best for us) and hey he is 19 now and in his final year of Uni, holding down a part time job and living his life being true to himself and is happy. He got where he is having done a lot of playing over the years (often it seemed to others that he was mostly playing  ) and teaching himself what he wanted when he needed it and he learned it much quicker that way than when I tried to teach him when he wasn't ready or interested..

Anyway, I just wanted to share this with those other fellow worriers and just know that things do work out for so many who have chosen to homeschool (or unschool or whatever you personally like to call it) and I bet we have all got wherever we wanted to be using a different path to many others - so if you are a worrier try to hold onto this knowledge - it will all work out just fine and you are able and capable of doing this whichever way you choose <3

Home Schooling a 2e Child

Home schooling a child with ADHD/Aspergers/Twice Exceptional (wow what a label!!!!)

I have been asked many times what it is like to home school my son who was diagnosed age three with ADHD and then having started school got a few more labels added namely Aspergers with a mix of Giftedness, together with a learning disability, known as Dysgraphia and all combined together makes for a beautiful but somewhat challenging young man.

I began my home school journey around six years ago when my son having been stood down from most schools (including the one at which I taught) began attending an alternative school in Auckland, that catered for children that were somewhat outside of the ‘norm’. This was a disaster and Samuel became depressed after countless episodes of bullying. My son is a very upbeat person and I really could not stand by and watch his whole personality change before my eyes and all in the name of gaining an education. Henceforth I took a deep breath, argued my case with my husband and decided to bale out of the traditional system and try ‘school at home’.

I was nervous about my decision and really wondered whether I was up to something so ‘different’. I had never questioned school really and certainly had no experience with home schooling, nor knew of an other people home schooling. However, one of the first things I did was reach out and find my local home school community and I really began to tap into what they had to offer. It was not always successful as even within that environment Samuel stood out as different, but it did give me a reference point and somewhere to turn to when I needed help.

At home, to begin with, we really did very little (unschooled), to give ourselves a breather from the stress that had amounted for us both due to what had happened at school. It was a wonderful time where we enjoyed each other’s company, relaxed and planed our way forward. I had trained as a teacher the year before I decided to home school, which is funny because it really fired my enthusiasm for leaving the system! I saw how difficult it was to cater for children who do have extra needs, whatever they may be and it gave me the passion to make a difference for at least one child who struggled against the grain, namely my son. 

Another benefit for being a ‘qualified’ teacher it gave me some kudos when people asked why Samuel was not at school. I would tell them he was ‘home schooled’ and that I was a trained teacher and they seemed to accept this as better than if I was not! The fact is ANYONE can home school and my training had no benefits to me other than enabling me to see school both from the perspective of a teacher and as a Mum with a child that has ‘special needs’.

Once we had settled more with our decision to home school and accepted this next stage in our ‘educational’ journey Samuel and I decided that a topic based approach would be best. I initially started by running our day very like school with lessons in 45 minute blocks. This really did not work for us and neither was it necessary. Children with ADHD often lack focus and are easily distracted so I found it good to have a quite space for Samuel where he was relaxed but without constant interruption or unnecessary distractions. We compiled a little timetable to help with his organisation, which he really struggles with, but flexibility within that was the best for both of us. Samuel often hyper focuses (another characteristic of both ADHD and Aspergers) and rather seeing that as a deficit we let it work to our advantage. If Samuel was really fired up about a subject and wanted to work on it all day then that was fine. It was amazing how much he covered in a few hours without all the constant interruptions. I also found that when Samuel chose his topic it gave him ownership that also fuelled his motivation, which is not always there with these children. He is a bright child who thrived on this and rather than relying on a teacher for the answers he really wanted to just problem solve and work it out for himself.

Another benefit we found was that where at school he had been conscious of his inability to write and was embarrassed by it because of remarks by other children, at home he had none of this pressure. We did not focus on writing and indeed I helped to teach Samuel to type and would also get him to use a dictaphone to transcribe his stories which I would then type for him. When he was at school he spent many lunchtimes kept in to write up what he could not do during the lesson. The fact is Samuel will never be good at writing in the traditional sense however many ‘remedial’ lessons he receives so we decided to focus on his strengths and build up his self esteem again.

He has exceptional abilities in maths and computing and I felt unskilled in those areas so we decided to tap into distance education where he was able to do papers at his level, which was above his chronological age. He loved this time and built up a rapport with his distant education teachers that did not really materialise at mainstream school. Mainstream school teachers judged Samuel on some of the more challenging behavioural aspects of his condition rather than on the ‘whole’ person. Samuel at home talking online was not judged and neither did many of those ‘behavioural issues’ surface when he was working in a more relaxed, unpressured environment.

We have carried on in this way over the years until recently when Samuel decided that he wanted to do Software Engineering at University. We approached the local University and made enquiries as to how he could get in without the traditional qualifications. On research for us we found the best way for Samuel would be to enrol in Distant Education full time and he is now doing his OP subjects. He has been accelerated a year and is also attending University one day a week which he is loving. He is now 15 and for me looking back over the years I am amazed at how far he has come. I at times worried so much for his future because I was made to worry. Since Samuel has been home schooled we have really dropped many of the ‘labels’ that seemed to be so necessary for him during his time in mainstream. We have no need for labels at home. He is just Samuel. He no longer goes to all the ‘specialists’ he used to, who tried to ‘fix’ him. I am no longer made to feel guilty because I choose not to medicate him. I have found home schooling to be the best thing that we have ever done and for anyone who has a child with ‘special needs’ it can be so rewarding. I have really seen a blossoming in my child and I hope that my story may help, inspire or encourage others to take that initial step for a better future for our children who march to a different beat. J